Thoughts on the Transition Process

 

 

 Below is a Ten-Point Plan for parents to help their child transition into the new life that lies ahead of them.

 

1.  Involve the children at an early stage. Speak to the children about the host culture and what awaits the family in the new country. Give the children a chance to be in charge of parts of their preparations for moving rather than deciding everything on their behalf. Try to minimize the fear of the unknown.

2.  Both parents should display a positive yet realistic attitude, as this resonates within the family. With this in mind be careful with what you say; the smallest negative comment overheard bounces back at a later point in time.

3.  The concerns of children when confronted with a move differ from those of parents. The child's initial focus is on losing friends followed by the major challenge of finding new ones. The concerns of the parents hover around the education and school performance of the children. Please do not under estimate the stress felt on the part of your child.

4.  When possible, avoid implementing other changes during this time of flux, i.e. family separation etc. These multiple layers inhibit a rapid integration, whereas continuity will assist the process.

5.  Consistency is also important on the home front. Your specific family rules and code of conduct should be maintained even when at times it seems that all other matters are at loose ends.

6.  Encourage your children to keep their friendships.

7.  Help and actively support your children in the finding of new friends.

8.  Be aware that children adapt to their new environment at different rates. Typically this adjustment period is three to four months. Add more time when your move has taken your family to a foreign language culture.

9.  Be prepared for a performance loss at school during the first six months. Please show understanding by having patience and confidence in the future.

10.    Most domestic accidents happen after the first six months. Have your security and safety precautions up and running all the time. ENJOY YOURSELVES!!

 

Source: Hilly van Swol-Ulbrich, 2002